Drop the Soap! – The Truth About Sex After 40
It doesn’t matter if you’ve been married for ten, fifteen or 20 years, divorced and have a new partner, or maybe just fooling around after your husband left you for a nineteen year old. There are some universal truths that apply to everybody who has passed the 40 candles mark, and involve a number of important changes including libido, sexual response and creative endeavors.
Here is a short summary thereof:
No rocket science
While there is much ado about ED (not Ed, the program co-produced by David Letterman’s Worldwide Pants Incorporated, but more likely the male erectile dysfunction), one thing has to be put straight (up): if a man sees a hot body in front of him, baring itself naked, than no torpedo or guided missile will stop him from wanting to enter it (even if at a slightly curved angle). I mean let’s be honest, there is only that much a man can withstand, and female nakedness surely isn’t one of those things! So, for all those ladies who with oversized enthusiasm bemoan their lack of attractiveness, I can you assure you, that for any (even a half mast) penis, there is nothing more beautiful than a pair of nipples pointing at him in dimmed light or looking him straight in the eye for that matter. All those curves, this fluffiness, this femaleness that the male body doesn’t posses will undeviatingly guide his little brain in his object’s of desire direction (and then who cares if it’s more sponge-like or firm when it does it, plus we can certainly work on that).
Since the diminishing hormones are not in the driver’s seat of our sex life anymore, then who’s in charge of our fit as fiddle sexuality? It turns out, the major player is bonding, intimacy, and knowing your body, as opposed to when you were hormone bound in your twenties, and knew nada of any of these. Unsurprisingly, being aware of our desires, fantasies and even some better-kept-private animalistic urges, means hitting the sexual jackpot for many. Being older, you don’t have to hide under covers announcing to your partner your favourite wheelbarrow position (there are two for clarity) or that you prefer the Crouching tiger to The lazy Susan under any circumstances. Finally, you get to play dirty and to like it, without having to put on the cat woman costume. As a veteran of the sex skill, you achieve a hell of an orgasm just looking at a Ryan Gosling picture, without the help of a vibrator or any specialist toys. With grey hair adding on your head (and elsewhere) you begin to know your body inside out, to that extend, that the twenty-old you standing here would be completely jealous. You know where your G-spot is and which position enhances its enjoyment, you’re aware of what pleases and what irritates you, and how your partner should tickle you to generate some heat under the covers. So, at the end of the day, when it comes to sex, you’re the queen of the game and your bed is your throne!
Kama sutra Baby!
When you go down the sex avenue after 40, I mean you really go down, except not in performance. Many rediscover the tenderness, fondling and overall skin-to-skin entertainment, and are happy to go way down below the waist to give their foreplay a little seasoning. And with the en route acquired skills, what used to be a quickie some twenty years ago, now becomes the Kama sutra version of blowing the covers off. You become the master/mistress of erotic pleasure, including sensual moaning, tender caresses and subsequently all 64 Sanskrit positions. Nothing is left untried, untested and unexplored (not even the whole 12 embraces) in the game of lovemaking, where anticipation becomes equally important as the physical contact. What was rushed some time ago is given time to savor, and turns into an integrated part of sensual ecstasy (without the hallucinogen powder). In the end, every caress, every touch, every bite celebrates the sheer pleasure of affection, with the body becoming canvas for unrestrained indulgence.
Woman’s best friend
Probably the only downside, the only discomfort of matured sensuality is, that from now on you’ll have to befriend (and not on Facebook, but rather in bed) the good old Almond Oil or a similar kind of lotion. With the ultimate thinning of the cervical walls, you’ll be on the mercy of some sort of greasy coating, in order to prevent burning out your clitoris, when you bend down to do the Downward dog (despite similarity in name, this is not a yoga position, although surely more enjoyable). And if you’re stuck with some leftovers from your smoothing lotion, you’re free to use it as tantric oil for the both of you and discover your most temperamental erogenous zones.