30 Reasons Why Blogging Is Better Than Sex
There’s no better way to start the New Year than talking about sex, isn’t it? Something I haven’t done in a while (I mean talking of course 😉 ) which is why I decided to look into this subject a little deeper.
I got intrigued by a recent survey, according to which 46 percent of women would rather give up sex than lose their Internet connection. I presume the same truth would also apply to blogging.
Here are 30 reasons why blogging is better than sex:
1. The only thing getting pounded is your keyboard.
2. You don’t have to morph into a sex goddess to get people’s attention.
3. Instant gratification is guaranteed, always.
4. You don’t have to fake a thing.
5. You don’t need to be vocal.
6. The only thing vibrating here is your mouse and not a glow-in-the-dark gizmo.
7. You don’t have to anticipate the climax. Hitting the publish button is the climax.
8. You don’t need a lubricant. Things being slippery is counterproductive in writing.
9. You don’t have to talk dirty to keep going.
10. You won’t wake up the kids with loud moaning.
11. You don’t have to get intoxicated to get into the mood.
12. You don’t have to brush your teeth beforehand.
13. You don’t have to practice the “O” face.
14. You don’t have to incorporate extended foreplay to get excited.
15. You don’t have to wait for your partner to come.
16. No need for setting the mood with candles and music.
17. You can be as disinhibited as you like.
18. You don’t have to trim anything.
19. You don’t have to worry about contraception.
20. You don’t have to stress about failure.
21. The only spooning you’ll be doing is snugging your laptop.
22. You don’t have to worry about him snoring.
23. Your G-DRIVE is easier to operate than your G-spot.
24. You don’t need to be as flexible as a Cirque du Soleil acrobat to culminate.
25. The only thing ejecting is your memory stick.
26. When someone says they love your blog, they actually mean it.
27. Nothing comes between you and your laptop.
28. You can delete negative comments with a click of a button.
29. You don’t have to fake a headache.
30. You don’t have to see a therapist afterwards. Blogging is therapy.
10 thoughts on “30 Reasons Why Blogging Is Better Than Sex”
Abby, Girl you are a mess (slang for funny as hell 😂) I can’t stop laughing . I have to admit though some of the 30 I use to do now I’m down to 7 maybe 😏 . With my husband and I it gets pretty heavy round bill time if we manage to have money left over at the end of the month it’s on like hot buttered popcorn pop pop 😉. Ooo have I said too much . But I know I’m not the only one . Oh yeah and you don’t need that cigarette at the end 😏
Love Ya Girl
See you soon
Gloria, Girl! If I’m funny then you are h.i. larious! Buttered popcorn pop pop … You’re killing me. And no, you didn’t say too much. Bless you forever, Sister! xx Abby
Abby you cracked me up! I had to read them off to my husband although that was probably a mistake since most of those excuses I’ve used a time or ten! I’m doing good and hope you’re doing the same! Happy New Year!
Happy to see you’re doing well, Rena! Funny enough I’ve shared these with my hubby as well. And his response was: “So, you girls fake it most of the time? I knew it!” I guess it’s best if we keep this one a secret, what do you think? Lots of love! xx Abby
Absolutely sobbing (with laughter) over here! I can’t imagine why I find this so hilarious Abby 😉
What a fabulous start to the New Year woman, thank you & keep ’em coming please xxx
You bring me to my knees Michelle with your comments! I thought what the heck, let’s start the New Year on the right foot with some naughty naughty reflections. I still can’t believe I actually came up with: the only thing getting pounded is your keyboard. That’s my favourite. Hopefully not too graphic for some? xx Abby
O M G. These are so funny, and ring so true for a blogger, for sure! I will glady stay awake until the wee hours working on my blog… I WILL NOT sacrifice sleep for sex though 😀
I love that you’ve started the New Year with a BANG! Happy New Year to you, gorgeous Abby. Thank you for keeping in real and keeping it funny as hell. xxxx
Thank you Lisa! You’re the best! Somehow you always manage to say the right thing at the right time. About this post, I meant to write one like this for a while (since I love to write about sex in a sort of ‘he who cannot, teaches’ way 😉 ) Happy you liked it. And Happy New Year to you too! xx Abby
Thank you Abby for this very funny list. I am a bit late reading this post, but enjoying it as much as the others. Keep them coming (pun intended).
Greetje
Good one Greetje! Keep them coming indeed 😉 Happy you enjoyed the post. I think the next one should be coming soon. xx Abby